A Great Power with Little to No Responsibility

ME: I always like our time cuddling and watching movies or whatever, but I also like seeing how much you all do your own things: playing and drawing, being imaginative.

5YO: We like playing. It’s our superpower.


The beginning of the school year has already brought with it some interesting stories. Our youngest will say all kinds of things in and about testing situations. We got a really good report on some pre-kindergarten tests, but when we asked her about it, she said, “It was easy. All the answers were ‘d’.” It wasn’t a multiple choice test and certainly she was not asked repeatedly to identify the letter “d.”

Now she’s working with sight words and was asked to spell “the.” Her immediate answer: “F-a-i.”

We’ve learned that her spelling abilities and word recognition increase the closer in proximity she is to a TV or restaurant menu. Her reading skills “failed” her when she was near a fire alarm however at school last year. Not a conversation one wants to have with the principal one works for or the fire department.

After spelling “f-a-i” she gave a short lecture describing what a contortionist does using the word “contortionist” correctly.

We’re working on all this.

I’m partially to blame, I told my mom and teachers that I was color blind. Every time someone showed me a color, I said it was “gray.” I couldn’t write yet, but I also said I knew Japanese. The only thing I can think of is it came from watching Godzilla movies at a very young age, though all I got to see were the ones that were dubbed. They spoke my language, so I must be speaking Japanese. I don’t know. I can’t think of any other connection to Japan in my life at the time.


ME: How was school?
5YO & 7YO: Good! (They both tell me various stories. I get lots of details about recess and lunch.)
7YO: The 5YO got in trouble today.
ME: She did? What happened?
7YO: She doodooed in the hall.
ME: What?!
5YO: I did not!
7YO: (giggles)
ME: I didn’t really think you did.
(Later before dinner.)
ME: Did you get a call from school today?
WIFE: No. Why?
ME: I’ll tell you later.


Evidently a kindergartener decided to test the scissors with his tongue.

5YO: And then the teacher asked, “Did you just cut your tongue with the scissors?” and he said, “Yeth.” And then it bled a little.
7YO: Gross!
5YO: Another boy had a nose bleed.
7YO: That’s disgusting! I hate blood. I wish it wasn’t called “blood.”
5YO: We should call it “blush.” His nose was blushing.

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